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Hope in solitude

5/31/2020

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​If it were June, we would asking, “What is so rare as a day in June?” But instead, we are raving about the rarity of this last day in May. I feel hopeful as I look out of my front door and take in the sun, a little breeze, and the blue sky. I feel hopeful as I look across to the library, which tomorrow will begin preparations to open--first checking in books, next curbside pickup, then….?
    These personal harbingers of hope are in deep contrast to what’s going on outside my little bubble. How do I dare write about silence, solitude, and simplicity when so many are right now directly effected by the pandemic and racial violence? But dare I must. To continue I have to assume that readers of this blog are longing for silence, solitude, and simplicity and needing affirmation that it is okay to seek it out. I say, “Yes, it is okay!” We human beings require time alone so we can then go out and connect with others to help make the world a more loving place. We require time alone so we can stay hopeful.

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Pandemic reading

5/26/2020

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​My reading habits have shifted a little since this pandemic took over. I can still look across the street and see my personal storehouse of books, but the library is closed. Frequent emails tell of plans to open as soon as it’s safe for librarians and members. No question, curbside is the new way to go, not just for food establishments and retail shops, but also for libraries.
       For fiction I’ve settled on three mystery authors: Richard Kent Krueger, Henning Mankell, and Martha Grimes. I rotate, round and round and round, finding the next read in the series from the several book services my library has made available, and occasionally purchasing one on my Kindle.
     For non-fiction my ‘reading’ is auditory, via YouTube, Great Courses, podcasts, and T.V. news. However, curling up on the couch with a good mystery, is my pandemic default.

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Opening to the Mystery

5/15/2020

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 Pandemic possibility # 1: Opening up to the Mystery
    Every human being’s personal response to this pandemic is unique, and yet within my privileged social obit, there are similarities. We have, food, clothing, shelter, health care, and friends and family. One variable is our life stage?
      What remains for me, however, when all the outer coverings of life are striped away, is my is love of solitude, my contentment in being alone, and my faith. These three, all part of the same cloth, are the essence of who I am.
     Previously I mentioned my after supper walks to the nearby Wadsworth Cemetery. This evening ritual has become a habit as my day winds down. As I walk alone amongst the graves stones, I wonder about the mystery of life; I am drawn to God.
     God or faith might not be your words of choice, but I believe that the deep peace they can connote can embrace everyone who wanders through a cemetery. Allow these words of love, or your own expression, to deepen your experience of that ineffable call of the human longing.  The pandemic is opening up us up to the Mystery with a capital M.  

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Pandemic activities

5/12/2020

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​Here we are, isolated, alone or with others, whether we like solitude or prefer company, whether we are introverted or extroverted; our mobility and life options are limited. I trust that each of us has established certain activities that bring us joy and thus help form structure to our day.
    Here’s my current list of solo activities that I love. Since I am a somewhat  an ADHD kind of person, I love the variety. A little of this, a little of that, then back to a little of this!  A half an hour at an activity seems just about right.
• Jigsaw puzzle—while eating a dish of Wheaties
• Walking—while talking on the phone or looking at nature
• Reading—while lying down on the couch
• Knitting-while listening to music or a message on YouTube
• Cooking—while listening to the Great Course I’m taking
• Meditating—while doing NOTHING else
 
     I am aware of how privileged I am to have the luxury of personal list of joyful activities.

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A plate with a burger and veggies

5/6/2020

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​The other day i listened to a sermon by Br. Curtis Almquist, a brother of the Society of St. John the Evangelist (Episcopal) in Cambridge. He talked about our need for detachment, not as avoidance, but as a way to deal with life, which includes joys and concerns and everything in between.  
He said detachment is three things 
• Living life on life’s terms
• Living life to be cherished, not clung to.
• Making right choices in life. 
 
 I’ve been working with this as a three part process to help me emotionally, spiritually, and physically live my life in a positive, proactive, uplifting way. 
• Living life on life’s terms. Being honest about a situation, what is happening, how I am feeling about it, how others in my orbit are responding. Personal truth telling!
• Cherishing: Accept what I have been given; not clinging to how I wish it would be.
• Make choices: take action in ways that will benefit me, my friends and family, and in the world—me, those I know, and those I don’t. 
 
    These days our plates are full. I picture all the yummy things, which for me would include a burger. But alas, the plate would have to have vegetables ( I don’t like them). If I want to enjoy the burger I have to choose the veggies, which I can eat with a certain kind of detachment.

https://www.ssje.org/2018/05/01/cherishing-life-not-clinging-br-curtis-almquist/​

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Solitude v.v. being alone

5/4/2020

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​I love solitude, I love lots of time alone, days and days of it. That’s why I went to my cottage by the sea for five consecutive winters, spending the week days there alone. But I knew back then, and I know it now, that I loved that solitude because I had friends and family, and a husband, who kept the home fires burning, to return to each weekend.
     Recently I have had contact with someone is desperately lonely during this pandemic. She told me that since she’d lived alone for so many years, she thought this isolation would be easy. But not so. All her ‘communities’ have been taken away--committees, professional clubs, church, luncheon gatherings, you name it. Her family lives far away, and they have busy lives, and don’t contact her as much as she’d like. She is alone with herself.
      For me, being alone is not same as solitude. Being alone can connote loneliness in the midst of physical and emotional isolation. Solitude is a way of being with one’s self and with God.  

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Early morning walk

5/2/2020

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​    Up the street from where we live is Wadsworth Cemetery. Lately I’ve been going there after supper, but yesterday it was raining so I postponed by visit until this morning, when I set off at 6:30, coffee in hand.
    I find cemeteries peaceful, calming, and hopeful. If I can embrace that dying is part of living, that death is part of life, I can wander about among the grave stones and feel peaceful; I can breathe in the flowers, flags, sunlight and shadows and feel calm; I can look across the street to a home that was once a stop on the Underground Railroad and feel hopeful.
    COVID-19 is catapulting us to face the death issue, and forcing us to think about our own death and those we know and love, and to consider what the death of the universe as we know it might mean.  Visiting cemeteries is one way to bridge the gap between living and dying, and between life and death. It is one way that brings me calm, peace, and hope.
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    Contact me: bobbifisher.mac@mac.com

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