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Your own facemask first~

10/10/2018

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Moving on, keeping positive. That’s me. Yesterday evening I watched just a tad of the news before tuning into the first seven innings of the Red Sox 5 to 4 win over the Yankees to clinch the American League Division Championship. Turning off the T.V. before the stressful ninth inning, gave me a good night’s sleep, and offered joy in the morning as I watched the replay.
    What I’ve just written doesn’t indicate that I inspired, affirmed or encouraged anyone but myself. But keeping stress out of one’s life is a form of putting one’s facemask on first before helping. It sets us up for I-Thou, not I-Me. Good start.

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Writing inspiration from Alcott and Emerson

5/21/2018

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PictureEmerson's writing desk
     I’m again inspired by Ralph Waldo Emerson and the many artists that gathered together in his parlor at Emerson House in Concord. This weekend we saw the writing desks of Louisa May Alcott at Orchard House and Ralph Waldo Emerson at Emerson House just down the road. Here’s how the stories were told by the engaging tour guides.
      Louisa wrote at a desk built for her by her father. It circled the window and there she sat writing throughout the light hours of the day.
      Emerson wrote all morning at the desk in his study. In the afternoon he walked to Walden; in the evening he chatted with friends in the parlor.
       We were told that Louisa’s mother worked extremely hard both inside and outside the home, cooking, cleaning, and sewing, thus giving her daughter time to write. Thankfully the family reaped the benefits of their hard work, for with the publication of Little Women, Louisa was able to support the family financially.
    The Emersons were not poor, nor were the rich. Waldo (as Emerson requested to be called) supported the family with lyceum talks he gave in New England and beyond. He had time to develop his thoughts and plan his talks, time to read, write, think, and discuss with others because, in part, his wife Lydian cared for the children and managed those hired to help in the household. That was the family social structure in the mid-nineteenth century.
       My point is that these two writers had TIME and permission to write without the burden of many of the distractions we have today. It’s a different world, so we have to manage our time in different ways. Now is now, then was then.
      I wrote about this October 2017 here.
www.acottagebythesea.net/a-solitary-traveler

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Louisa May Alcott's writing desk.
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Texting, not talking~

10/6/2014

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This isn’t the first time I’ve mentioned some of the annoying noises that I encounter on my walks around the neighborhood. The top two are the leaf blowers and mowers that I pass, and the enormous garbage and transport trucks that pass me.

     On the other hand, there are sounds that I love to hear, specifically people enjoying each other: families chatting while on a bike ride, friends walking and talking. The other day I wished for just such a conversation, but unfortunately, there was only silence. A little boy and his mom were leaving their house and on the way to the car. The toddler was doing just what a two year old should be doing; he was slowly and carefully walking along the little stone border that separated the lawn from the walkway. The mom, on the other hand, was doing just what a young mom should not be doing; she was texting.

    I wanted to be hearing a conversation between the two of them. What an opportunity for the mom to affirm what her son was doing, to extend language, to model how human beings interact with each other in a positive way. I won’t go into all the negatives that were happening; you can fill in the blanks.

      When my children were toddlers, there was no texting. I am aware that it’s a different world today, but I also know that everyone, not just little kids, wants the full attention of another. That will never change, nor will the opportunities, nor will the option to put the cell phone away.


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Aldingerstudio

3/2/2014

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I’m very excited to introduce to you my daughter’s hand-designed, hand-made cards. Emily has been making cards for years, and has now decided to follow her bliss by selling her creations on line.

Those of you who have followed my blog for any length of time are probably aware that I usually don’t write personally about family and friends. Of course, there always are exceptions to the rule, and I’m sure you will understand this one. I’ve always believed in advocating for my own near and dear, and a daughter is definitely in that category.

Emily's cards are appealing, imaginative and professionally crafted.  She continually adds to her repertoire of designs for all occasions and holidays, and will create announcement cards and invitations to meet your particular specifications. You can find her cards on

http://www.etsy.com/shop/aldingerstudio







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Chatter about silence~

3/4/2013

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Here’s my chatter about my weekend, which was full of chatter, good chatter, but chatter. You know, the giving and receiving chatter-- I gave some, I received some. Although I have no intention or desire to rid my life of all chatter, I sometimes feel I get too much of it, even as I’m aware that it is the currency of a well working society, and particularly of friends and family.

    Yesterday at the farewell reception for our youth group directors at church, the kids were doing their own version of chatter—running around, while waiting for the cake to be cut. Once they had a little more sugar in their bodies, they were fine. I knew that soon I would be heading up here, but what about the parents? A cottage by the sea won’t be on their agenda for many years. Nonetheless, I hope they can find a little time to craft some silence, solitude and simplicity that allows them to take a few deep breaths, and to let them out. That’s the purposes of this blog, to inspire, encourage and affirm.


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Expressing 'Personal Authority'

1/19/2013

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I am sooooo “very grateful” for the silence, solitude and simplicity that I have in my life, and am fully aware that my cottage-by-the-sea ‘heaven’ is a moment in time. Actually, it is one of several moments in my life when I have consciously embraced the 3Ss for an extending period of time, although I must admit that this is a mighty special one. Of course, times and circumstance will change, but I trust that my longing (and thus wherewithal) to live in silence, solitude and simplicity will continue.

     According to James Hollis, in Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life, it is personal authority (PA) that sustains us to remain true to our deepest longings. Here’s how he describes it.

“What constitutes “personal authority”? Stated most simply it means, to find what is true for oneself and to live it in the world. If it is not lived, it is not yet real for us, and we abide in what Sartre called “bad faith,” the theologian calls “sin,” the therapist calls ‘neurosis,” and the existential philosopher calls ‘inauthentic being.” Respectful of the rights and perspectives of others, personal authority is neither narcissistic nor imperialistic. It is a humble acknowledgment of what wishes to come to being through us. If the ego does not step out of the way of that energy that wishes to live through us, the energy will trample us in pathological outbreaks, or something vital within us will die, even though our bodies may keep moving for decades. We all, privately, know this imperative summons every day, though we may flee it: find what is true for you; find the courage to live it in the world; and the world will in time come to respect you (though at first you may confuse others and scare them).”

    As I’ve said before, my hope is that this blog will inspire, affirm and encourage my readers to find their own true longing and to have the personal authority to live it in their lives. On the days when this is easy, and when you need courage, remember Joseph Campbell and, “Follow your bliss.”


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Finding peace

12/25/2010

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Our simple jade tree on this Christmas morning.
       One December day when I was teaching kindergarten a five year old came up and asked me, “Are you Christmas?” It cracked me up to realize how young children go right to the core of things to get just the information they need.
       So, for all of you who “are Christmas,” a Merry Christmas to you. For all of you, whether you “are Christmas” or “are something else”, I hope that this holiday season will affirm, inspire and encourage you to find the peace and purpose that you long for in your life. I believe that that is everybody’s goal; it is certainly my purpose in writing this blog
       Sarah’s comment on December 23rd has affirmed, inspired and encouraged me to keep going. Thank you, Sarah. And thank you, Ann, for reminding us to notice all the people who have been friendly and kind, and to be thankful.



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