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Nurture the positive

3/11/2023

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PictureHere they are again!
There's been another long gap between the posts of this old woman. Here's an update. I'm 83 now, but not feeling very old. Supposedly I have 'arthritic knees', but I hardly notice any pain, not even a feeling. I walk a couple of miles a day, and go up and down stairs probably 30 times from morning 'til night. I don't remember everyone's name, but I've never been good at that. I rarely sleep through the night, but that has never been my strong suit. Of course this good health has to do with good genes. My mom lived to be 101 and the only medicine she took was Synthroid, for her thyroid. My dad died at the age 80 of prostate cancer, so I'm off the hook on that one. 
      It is the other gene, that I want to celebrate. A hopeful, positive spirit that I inherited from both my parents. And yet, I have to keep at it. It's a gift to be grateful for, but one that needs continuous nurturing and attention.

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       I am a 78 year old white, educated, privileged woman, in excellent health, with a wonderful family. I go to church and travel by myself to Italy and Scotland. That’s my public vita, my public persona. But that’s not all who I am. I have secrets, secrets of an old woman. So let me say some more.
         I’m old. Not in the usual physical ways of a person age 78, but I’m old in years, and that very fact guides the sense of meaning that I feel and experience in my life. Put succinctly, more and more my age is becoming the filter through which I lead my life.
         I’ve had a rich life, with caring parents, a loving husband of 54 years, two wonderful children, and four amazing grandchildren. My teaching career was rewarding; I published six books for teachers describing my experiences as a kindergarten and first grade teacher. When I retired I earned a divinity degree and became the spiritual care counselor for a local hospice.
        I ask myself if now I am really retired. Well, yes and no. Yes, in that I have more free and unscheduled time to satisfy my longing for silence, solitude and simplicity, which I blog about in this blog-- www.acottagebythesea.net, and more time to attend to my spiritual life, which I blog about in www.aprayerdiary.net. I have more time to spend with family and friends, help at church, read for pleasure, write, and travel,. My old woman secret is that I am still searching for meaning and the search is intense and life supporting.

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